Friend Zone 친구 사이 Take the Plunge 과감히 결단하다 (0904 파워잉글리쉬스크립트)
Power Warm-up: Asking Someone Out: I’m Really Nervous!
Ian wants to ask his good friend Sandra out on a date. The only problem is that he doesn’t know if she only likes him as a friend or likes him romantically. Melinda suggests he just ask her.
Expressions
Kristen:
Welcome to our show.
Cameron:
We’re so glad you tuned in.
Kristen:
Yes, for sure. Now, on Wednesdays, we have a daily life dialog. And I’d like to talk about the topic this month, asking someone out. So, for all of you single folks, if you’re single, this is really changed in the last decade, decade or two, right? Before you would call or I mean you would find other ways. it would be more about one-on-one face-to-face like, “Hey, would you like to have dinner?” that kind of thing, but these days online dating it seems to be very common.
Cameron:
Yes. So first to ask someone out means to ask them on a date. 데이트 신청하는 거죠. You’re saying would you like to go on a date? And I would say like my generation and younger.
Kristen:
Younger, yeah.
Cameron:
I don’t know if anyone really does it in person anymore. It would either be through the dating apps that they have or regular social media.
Kristen:
Yeah.
Cameron:
Send a private message. Or if it’s someone you know, you might even do it over text message. Instead of doing it in person.
Kristen:
Like it’s kind of you would probably get start getting to know each other over text and then say, oh, you want to meet up for dinner or you want to have some coffee?
Cameron:
Yeah. That sort of thing. You know, I think in the past, people used to just like see someone at a bar or a restaurant, don’t know them, but like give them your phone number. That doesn’t happen anymore.
Kristen:
My generation. Okay. So that’s what we are going to be talking about on Wednesdays. So, as you mentioned, ask someone out, 데이트 신청하기. You’re asking someone, hey, would you like to go out on a date with me? What is a friend zone? Z-O-N-E.
Cameron:
It’s whenever you only think of that person as a friend. You do not think of them as a romantic interest.
Kristen:
We are only friends. Okay. And then take the plunge. P-L-U-N-G-E.
Cameron:
This is to do something risky, to do something that maybe could fail. And we often use it for things like asking someone on a date or definitely getting married.
Kristen:
Right. Okay, very good. So let’s go ahead and listen to our power dialog.
Power Dialog
Melinda: Hey Ian, did you just run here from home? You’re sweating a lot.
Ian: No, I’m just really nervous. I want to ask Sandra out, but I’m afraid she’ll say no.
Melinda: Haven’t you two been friends for like five years?
Ian: That’s the problem. I’m afraid I might be in the friend zone with her. I mean, it sometimes feels like we’re flirting, but maybe I’m wrong.
Melinda: There’s only one way to find out. You just have to take the plunge.
Ian: What if she says no? Can we still be friends?
Kristen:
Okay, please turn to page 20. We’ve got our power dialogue. Asking someone out, I’m really nervous. Melinda says, hey, Ian, did you just run here from home? You’re sweating a lot. Oh, like you look, you know, and you’re sweating. Yeah. And what does Ian say? No.
Cameron:
Nervous, I’m just really nervous. I want to ask Sandra out, but I’m afraid she’ll say no.
Kristen:
Okay so, traditionally, Cameron, we have the man asking out the woman. If you ask them out, as we just talked about, it is, would you like to go on a date? Ask someone out.
Cameron:
To ask someone out.
Kristen:
Now, do you think this is still…
Cameron:
I don’t think so really anymore.
Kristen:
I think we’re…
Cameron:
I think sometimes it happens, and I do think maybe women will ask more often, but most often it’s just a dating app now.
Kristen:
Yeah, you don’t ask out. Yeah, you don’t ask someone out.
Cameron:
Yeah. Because it’s kind of like a high-risk question. But if you do it on a dating app, because you like match, right? You already know that the other person is interested in you. So, it’s so much easier to ask that question.
Kristen:
Right, because in this dialogue, Ian is really nervous.
Cameron:
Oh, yeah.
Kristen:
Wouldn’t you be?
Cameron:
Yeah! Definitely!
Kristen:
The fear of rejection.
Cameron:
Well, yeah, what if they’re good friends, but then she says no, and it ruins the friendship.
Kristen:
It’s like when Harry met Sally. Yeah. They’re best friends. When do you take it to the next level? Or do you? Oh my. Okay. All right. So to ask someone out just basically means 데이트 신청하기. Melinda says, haven’t you two been friends for like five years? You see, here’s the thing. They’re friends.
Cameron:
Too long. Five years is too long.
Kristen:
Five years?
Cameron:
It is. It’s too long. You have too much history.
Kristen:
Oh no.
Cameron:
Like I don’t know if it’s someone that you’re romantically interested in,
Kristen:
Six months.
Cameron:
Maybe. Yeah, you have a small window of time where you can go from friends to lovers.
Kristen:
Right. You make a good point.
Cameron:
Otherwise, you know, you become like brother and sister at some point.
Kristen:
Yes!
Cameron:
Then it’s hard, yeah.
Kristen:
Then it’s more awkward. Okay, Ian says, that’s the problem. I’m afraid I might be in the friend zone with her. I mean, it sometimes feels like we’re flirting, but maybe I’m wrong. Okay, like you just said, that friend zone. If you’re in the friend zone, it’s hard to get out of the friend zone. What is a friend zone?
Cameron:
It means that the person you like only thinks of you as a friend. So if you’re a boy that has a crush on a girl, you like a girl, but she’s like, Oh my! You’re like a brother to me, you’re my best friend! That’s being in the friend zone.
Kristen:
Okay.
Cameron:
Yeah.
Kristen:
This is kind of a new term, don’t you think? A new expression?
Cameron:
Yeah, maybe the last 10 to 15 years.
Kristen:
Yes.
Cameron:
It can also be used as a verb. So, I’ve been friend-zoned. Oh. It means that she has said no to a date, and she only wants to see me as a friend. Or, you know, the other way.
Kristen:
I’ve been friend-zoned.
Cameron:
I’ve been friend-zoned.
Kristen:
So that means that you are permanently in that zone.
Cameron:
And sometimes you do this on purpose. Sometimes you know the other person is interested in you romantically and you want to stop it. So, you saying things like, Oh, you’re such a good friend. Oh, I can’t imagine if you weren’t my friend. You just use the word friend all the time to tell them. That would be friend zoning someone.
Kristen:
너무 좋은 친구야, 친구!
Cameron:
I’m so happy you’re my friend.
Kristen:
Right. Okay. I like that expression friend zone. Okay. Here’s another word. Um, sometimes it feels like we’re flirting. Okay. This is a big word for people, for single folks. Flirt to flirt.
Cameron:
Yes. So, flirt is a word, I think that there is not an exact word in Korean. So the flirt here is you’re kind of being playful with someone in a romantic way. But sometimes it’s very romantic. Yeah. Sometimes it’s only slightly romantic.
Kristen:
I see.
Cameron:
Sometimes you might flirt with someone that you don’t really want to date, right?
Kristen:
Right. Yes.
Cameron:
You know…
Kristen:
It’s just, you’re just having a good time.
Cameron:
You’re having a good time. But, strong flirting is definitely trying to show, oh, hey, I’m interested in you romantically.
Kristen:
Romantically. Yeah.
Cameron:
And it’s just, you know, it’s the little jokes you do. Yeah.
Kristen:
Yeah.
Cameron:
Or like– When the girl like,
Kristen:
Or she like hits them and…
Cameron:
Yeah. Flips her hair. The guy like leans back and he’s like, yeah, you know, I was like lifting weights in the gym. And it’s like, I don’t know, like trying to impress the other person. That would be kind of flirting, right?
Kristen:
Learning. Okay. So what does Melinda say?
Cameron:
There’s only one way to find out. You just have to take the plunge.
Kristen:
So, the only way to know if she wants to date you is to take the plunge. We’ve learned this expression before. Yeah. And we associated it with getting married. Okay. But it can work this way, too?
Cameron:
Right. So we do use this often to mean to get married because we see marriage as a honestly a very big decision. Maybe risky. Your life completely changes. So it’s a big decision and kind of a big adventure that is maybe risky. In the same way, other things like asking someone on a date that you’re nervous about. Because once you ask that question, you can’t return to normal.
Kristen:
You can’t go back.
Cameron:
Once the word is out, you cannot take those words back.
Kristen:
Yeah.
Cameron:
That’s right. It’s kind of taking a plunge. It’s taking a risk that you cannot take back.
Kristen:
That’s right, because once you ask, you are telling them you like them. So it changes the dynamic.
Cameron:
It does.
Kristen:
And Ian says, what if she says no? Can we still be friends? Okay, what if is the power pattern?
Cameron:
Yeah. What if this is a way of imagining a possibility in the future? What if she says no? So it’s like, what will happen if she says no?
Kristen:
Yeah, that’s right. What if I don’t get into the school? What if she doesn’t like me? You know, these sort of kind of questions that you just wonder about.
Cameron:
What if I wake up late?
Kristen:
Oh no.
Cameron:
On my wedding day.
Kristen:
Okay. Okay, let’s go ahead and listen to that dialogue one more time.
Power Dialog
Melinda: Hey Ian, did you just run here from home? You’re sweating a lot.
Ian: No, I’m just really nervous. I want to ask Sandra out, but I’m afraid she’ll say no.
Melinda: Haven’t you two been friends for like five years?
Ian: That’s the problem. I’m afraid I might be in the friend zone with her. I mean, it sometimes feels like we’re flirting, but maybe I’m wrong.
Melinda: There’s only one way to find out. You just have to take the plunge.
Ian: What if she says no? Can we still be friends?
Cameron:
Alright, let’s take a look at Power Note on pages 22 and 23.
1. ask someone out: 데이트신청을 하다
Kristen:
Here we go. So, if you ask someone out, you’re asking them on a date. So let’s look at the sample dialogue.
1)
A: I heard you asked Clara out the other day.
B: Did you also hear that she said no?
Kristen:
Yeah. So to ask someone out is pretty much only in terms of dating, right?
Cameron:
Yeah.
Kristen:
I would say.
2) If you don’t ask Shauna out, I will.
Cameron:
You know, it’s interesting. I think that this phrase, to ask someone out, is most often used with someone that you already know. Okay. It’s someone in your friends’ group. They’re your friends or they’re your coworker. There’s someone you already know and you’re asking them out on a date like as a change in relationship. I don’t think that if you just meet the person, you ask them out. Maybe you can ask them to go on a date. But to ask out does feel it’s like someone you already know.
Kristen:
Yes.
Cameron:
In some way. But you’re now kind of admitting that you like them.
Kristen:
That’s right.
Cameron:
And you want to go on a date with him.
Kristen:
Yeah, and that’s why asking someone out can be extremely difficult. It’s better to ask a stranger and say no I’m like, okay. But someone you know that you have a relationship with already that can be really tricky and awkward.
2. Friend zone: 친구 사이
Okay, the friend zone. Let’s talk about that. This is someone that you are treating just as a friend No more than that.
1)
A: We should take a vacation together Donna.
B: As long as you don’t have romantic intentions, because you’re in the friend zone, Mike.
Kristen:
Okay.
Cameron:
Well, that’s very direct. I wouldn’t say, we don’t often say it to the person directly. You’re in the friend zone with me. But I guess you can. That’s a pretty effective way.
Kristen:
I guess. Oftentimes, I think this happens when you’re talking to someone like your friend and like, oh, what is how’s it going between you and, you know, so and so. Oh, yeah. Like, I think she likes me, but I think we’re still in the friend zone.
Cameron:
Still in the friend zone.
2) I spent years in the friend zone before Mikaela realized she was in love with me.
Yeah, I know.
Cameron:
It can happen, I guess.
Kristen:
And I’ve seen cases where best friends become like husband and wife.
Cameron:
Yeah, I mean, I guess it can happen. But I often feel like with that, both sides secretly like each other. They just don’t say anything. So it goes for years and years and years.
Cameron:
I don’t know how often you are truly just friends and then later you realize that you like each other.
Kristen:
Well, there is always that big question, like, can women and men or, you know, whatever sex is, can they truly be just friends and not be romantically involved?
Cameron:
That’s when Harry met Sally. Don’t they talk about that? Yeah. I mean, they can.
Kristen:
I think you can.
Cameron:
I think you can. Sure. But I do think that there is, yeah, it’s really hard to go, it’s really hard to change the status. If you’re in the friend zone, I think you’re always going to be in the friend zone.
Kristen:
I agree. I agree. I agree. And yeah, unless like both of you agree on that. But if, of course, if one party, one person feels a little bit differently, probably they may not even be in the friend zone and just not be friends.
Cameron:
Or maybe it can change if like, you know, in movies when they get a big makeover. And then, oh, I only thought of you as a friend, but now you’re beautiful. Now you’re handsome. Yeah. Now I think now I’m romantically interested.
3. Take the plunge: 과감히 결단을 내리다.
Kristen:
That’s right. Alright, take the plunge. This expression basically means that you commit yourself to something. And usually there is maybe some risk involved too. Okay.
1)
A: Are you really moving to England?
B: Yep, I took the plunge and rented an apartment there. I leave in a week.
Kristen:
Okay. And this is a new place. You’ve never been, you’ve never lived in England, never been to England.
Cameron:
Yeah. Moving abroad, that is definitely taking the plunge.
Kristen:
It is. It’s good, but there’s some bad things that can happen, too.
2) Mark and Tyla took the plunge and got engaged to be married.
Cameron:
Marriage is one. Other things, big purchases. Take the plunge and…
Kristen:
Oh, yeah.
Cameron:
Buy a house. Ooh, yeah. Take the plunge and buy a car.
Kristen:
Sure.
Cameron:
Those are contracts that you can’t get out of easily and you’ve got to make big payments.
Kristen:
It’s a big commitment.
Cameron:
It’s a commitment.
Kristen:
Yeah. So think of the word commitment when you think of this phrase.
3. What if -? – 라면 어쩌지?
Okay, what if is our power pattern? Meaning…
Cameron:
What will happen if? What will we do if?
Kristen:
1) What if we can’t find a taxi at this hour?
Cameron:
Oh, then we’ll just walk home. Okay.
2) What if the power goes out during the storm?
Kristen:
We’ve got candles.
Cameron:
Yeah, we can just keep the refrigerator closed. Yeah. So the food doesn’t go bad.
5 Flirting: 작업 걸기, 유혹
Flirting is when someone who is romantically attracted to someone else says things that are complimentary or humorous in hopes of the other person being attracted to them as well.
Kristen:
Oh, I know. I’ve had that happen, you know, with lots of earthquakes. Power goes out. Okay. Flirting, very important word, probably for single folks. Power vocabulary on page 24.
Cameron:
And there’s also the power practice underneath. So please try to translate the Korean sentences into some of the English expressions that we’ve learned.
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